The Overflow, Backwash, Backlog, Logorrhea, Ad Hoc, Anyone-Can-Use, No-Word-Limit SPEAKEASY

March 5, 2007

A Time Machine, and a morally bizarre daydream…

Filed under: Radio Open Source Conversations — Nick @ 5:43 am

I was imagining what I would do with a time machine – but not a machine with unlimited range. Instead, this speculative time machine has a range of one century only. Now, if I could make only four stops (temporally speaking) using this machine, when would I choose to visit?

Keeping in mind that this is nothing more than a daydream concocted while running four miles listening in my Walkman to Gene Krupa & his Orchestra…

First, I’d wait until my life was nearing its actively pleasurable end; then, from least important to most important:
4. I’d make a stop in 1936 America to attend a performance of Benny Goodman & his Orchestra fronted by the Swing-perfect vocalist Helen Ward.
3. Another stop in either 1939 or 1940 to attend a performance of Duke Ellington & his Orchestra fronted by the sublime singer Ivie Anderson.
2a. A third stop in 1942 to attend a performance by Gene Krupa & his Orchestra fronted by trumpeter Roy ‘Little Jazz’ Eldridge and the MATCHLESS vocalist Anita O’Day.
2b. A flight across the pond to 1942 Europe. There I would pick up a Pole, a Jew, a Russian, and a Greek.
1. Once in the time machine, the five of us would stop off in 1912 Vienna. I’d show them how to return themselves to whenever they might choose without my having to be operating the machine.
Next, we’d locate a certain Austrian postcard painter, and I’d say, “There he is, fellas. Do whatever you want to him” – and then I’d probably pop right out of existence, since after the four of ‘em encountered the historically important painter, it’s unlikely my parents would have met.

But then, millions and millions of people ‘alive today’ suddenly wouldn’t be. So, what’s the ‘greater evil’?

What would you do? (Anyone?)


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